Who Has Your Remote?

15 05 2009

The first step in us learning to let go is to figure out who or what has your remote?  What do I mean by this? Well a remote is what controls the volume and/or the channels for a TV and if we utilize this concept when thinking about ourselves then what we are really asking is what are you allowing to control you?  What are you giving power to in your life?   What is able to change your channels?


This may help to better explain, according to Stress Management Therapist, Elizabeth Scott, “research has shown that those who feel that they control their own destiny, rather than their fate being largely determined by external forces–tend to be happier, less depressed, and less stressed.”   So in essence we are talking about you taking full control of you and not allowing your mood to shift according to the people places or things that occur around you.  It is as simple as when you are in the car driving to work and that other driver cuts you off, do you let them steal your joy? Are you one of those people who is yelling at the person in the other car, who cannot even hear you and yet you are going on and on for minutes even after you can no longer even see that other driver.  You see that other driver in that moment has your remote control as they have taken what may have been a peaceful morning and made it into a state of angry rage.  Believe it or not, your reaction to that other drive is based on choices you make.  Choices you make to be angry or to let it go.   This is a simple example but there are things that happen that can definitely turn your sunshine into rain if you allow it to; if we allow it control over our remote. It is important that we look at what we are giving our remote control to, what do we allow to affect who, how or what we are.  What is it that has your remote and if it is not in your hands, it’s time to take back your remote! 


 “You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.” – Brain Tracy

The most important thing you can do to take back the remote in your life is to notice how things affect you. If you feel yourself being negative, you have to choose to flip that remote to the positive channel.   Saying things like “I can’t” should be released from your vocabulary and instead figure out what you CAN do. Instead of fighting “what is,” we need to learn to accept and to be at peace.  All we CAN control is how we allow it to affect us and how we interact or react to it. By choosing to have peace, and trusting that what is meant to be shall be, we can hold onto more of a positive outlook in all things that come our way. By choosing what we allow to control us , we actually allow more positive energy to flow to us instead of trying to force what may not be meant to be….if it don’t fit, don’t force it.


  “In essence, if we want to direct our lives, we must take control of our consistent actions.  It’s not what we do once in a while that shapes our lives, but what we do consistently.” – Anthony Robbins

 We each have to be determined to accept people, places and things as they are and to know that you can’t change people, all you CAN do is change YOU,  you can change how it affects YOU and by doing this, you ARE taking back your remote.  You have your own power in your hands and releasing the hold negative emotions, people, places and/or things have had on you.  You are reclaiming your power and giving yourself the gift of peace of mind and going back into a positive moving direction to move toward your dream.  This week I ask you all to daily look at what you give your remote to?  What steals your joy?  What makes a good day turn into a bad one?    


“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own.  You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president.  You realize that you control your own destiny.” – Albert Ellis

“The secret of success is learning how to use pain and pleasure instead of having pain and pleasure use you.  If you do that you’re in control of your life.  If you don’t, life controls you.” – Anthony Robbins

“This life is yours.  Take the power to choose what you want to do and do it well.  Take the power to love what you want in life and love it honestly.  Take the power to control your own life. No one else can do it for you.  Take the power to make your life happy.” – Susan Polis Schutz




2 responses

15 05 2009

Your message is absolutely right. That’s how I try to live. You can’t control folks, you can only control how you react to folks. Keep up the positive messages.

16 05 2009
Jeanette Conrad-Ellis

Amen! If I’m running late I try to remind myself that I can be late and stressed or just late. I usually choose to just be late. The world didn’t give us our joy, and the world (and its antics and woes) can’t rob us of our joy. It’s a choice. It’s a daily reminder to choose to look at that glass as 1/2 full vs. 1/2 empty. BTW, my husband steals my remote to watch whatever he wants…lol! jc

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