Tear it Down

3 02 2011

As each of us focuses on becoming our own Divine Design for 2011 with Proverbs 31: 10-31 as our blueprint.  Today we begin our look at our 2nd key toward getting there – It’s Time for a Demolition

This month we will explore the first part of any makeover process, the demolition or the tearing down of the old to bring in the new.  This really takes last month’s discussion of cultivation and freeing your mind to a whole new level as we now look to increase the value of your home, of YOU.

One of my favorite TV shows is Extreme Makeover Home Edition.  On every show before they begin the makeover of any house the very first thing they do is tear down the old one.   Do you ever wonder why some folks decide to tear down an old house instead of just remodeling the current one that is standing?   Well most of the time when folks decide to remodel they want to make rooms bigger and to do that effectively you need more space.  Yes sometimes the new design calls for us to make more room.  The old foundation may not be big enough to hold the new design so we must TEAR IT down so that we can make room for the new.

 “No one tears a patch from a new garment and sews it on an old one. If he does, he will have torn the new garment, and the patch from the new will not match the old. And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the new wine will burst the skins, the wine will run out and the wineskins will be ruined.” – Luke 5:36 & 37

What I get from reading this bible verse is that by trying to put together the new with the old it will only result in damaging the new.  It is as if to say that trying to just fix up the old as if it is a new one, it will basically just be more messed up in the long hale. Why, because the old is still underneath and ultimately will begin to show itself again.   It’s like putting a fresh coat of paint over wallpaper, there is no way, that that wallpaper can stay without you seeing the old through that new paint.  Do you get what I am trying to say?  Well for many of us there is a need for renewal, remodel or rejuvenation. Many of us are reminded as we made New Year’s resolutions at the beginning of the year, that we need and desire to make change! But are we just trying to put something new on top of the old?

So if we are focused this week on tearing down that old so we can bring in the new….what is it that you need to tear down or let go of?  STOP and really think about this for a moment…

  • Is it negative thinking about yourself?
  • Is it a bad relationship?
  • Is it not believing in your dream of owning your own business?
  • Is it bad spending habits?
  • Bad eating habits?
  • Is it something that happened to you in your past – rape, abuse etc….?

Whatever those things are?  It is time to tear down whatever is hindering your progression.  In my book Define Your Own Way I call these things a cap.  A cap is what keeps the drink inside the bottle.  If the cap is not removed, the drink stays in the bottle and never gets sipped and the bottle can also never be filled up with more. Seems obvious what I might mean if I call whatever may be hindering you a cap , right?  If we consider this in regards to our own lives, think about what caps you may have placed on your life that may be hindering your progress, keeping your life in the bottle, keeping you in an old way of thinking and hindering you from the new?   Keeping you right where you are never to do or be more.   Have you ever asked yourself what caps you might be placing on your life?  please stop reading this BLOG for a moment and WRITE THEM DOWN NOW.

In his book, Measure of a Man, actor Sidney Poitier states;

“you are not responsible for what has happened but for what you make of it. It is up to each of us to take our own measure, to claim what’s real and to answer for yourself.”

You see, you may not have the power to change what has happened to you in the past or what others may have done to you in the past, but you do have power over how you allow it to affect your present and your future.  These experiences can keep you stuck and limit your possibilities, but only if you allow them.  So if your dad left,  prove to the world you can make it without him!   If you were raped or abused, you can take that negative circumstance in your life and figure out how you can turn it into positive.  That’s what I call a remodel!

By no means am I downplaying the act of abuse or any other thing that may have happened in your life that has made you feel like you can’t become who you desire to be.  While you cannot change what has happened, you can start from where you are. You can pick up a hammer and start your demolition by finding a professional counselor or finding a support group to obtain the tools you need to help you move forward with your life. Yes, I know that historically in the African American community, seeking mental health counseling has carried a stigma. But seeking counseling does not mean that you are “crazy”; it means you want to get over whatever is hindering your progress so you can move forward.  It means that you are ready for a remodel and  you are brining in the demolition trucks to tear down this negative thing that has kept you stuck so that you can tear it down, let it go and move forward and reconstruct your life.  Once you discover and remove what’s been hindering  your life, the sky is the limit for you!!!

It is time for each of us to discover what may be hindering us and take that straight to the demolition crew and TEAR IT DOWN!  Tear it down and make room for the new to be built in its place.   So what is it?  What do you need to Tear Down in your life to make room for new?

 “Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.” – Author Unknown

  “Opportunities to pursue fulfillment would be limited only by the outer margins of one’s individual ability.” –Sidney Poitier, from Measure of a Man

“Hanging onto resentment is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head.” – Ann Landers 

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